10.19.2011

STARTING OVER


Sometime next week, something really exciting is happening. I will pack my little, dented car with my most important belongings and drive twenty-two hours alone through four states to Denver, Colorado. As someone who enjoys condensing and organizing and new beginnings, this is such a huge opportunity. Since I made the decision to go about six weeks ago, I've purged dozens of items from my closet and given a lot of thought to why the ones that are staying have stayed. It's a practical exercise but it's also an introspective exercise. I realize how much I've changed in a year, in six months...I spent the last part of 2010 and the first three quarters of 2011 getting over a broken heart and growing out a related adventurously short haircut and all of a sudden the heart has healed and my hair is long and I guess I feel more like myself again. I tried a lot of things out in the past twelve months, sartorially and in my day-to-day life. Now I feel like I have at least some (let's not get too ambitious) direction in all aspects of my life and the key is simply to have the patience to wait until I stumble across the right thing because, well, I'll know it when I see it.

While organizing some books and folders I came across the art history thesis I wrote last year during my last four months of college. The cover is simple and perfect. In a sense I managed to distill the entire main point of my fifty page paper into two small images, placed side by side, over the title and date. I had no desire to read it again; I know it too intimately to enjoy it. Instead I was reminded of the process of writing it, and what I learned. 

I learned to start a project early, to allow time for meditation on important decisions, to listen to critics but ultimately take the path I felt confident in. I learned to just get some sleep, to go the extra mile for the details, to not put off anything important, and to approach hefty tasks by completing them in manageable pieces. Essentially...I learned not to settle. In the end I produced something strong. I received positive feedback, but in the end I didn't care. I had written about exactly what I wanted to write about. The work that I was launching out into the world was exactly what I wanted it to be.

When I created Object Log I had no idea what it would be about. Now I think I know. It's about not settling. I will use this as a place to post things that inspire me to keeping searching for what I truly want, and track my progress as I build a compact, quality wardrobe. We live in our clothes, and as someone who has had a nomadic early twenties, I understand that they are the only thing that accompanies us everywhere. What we dress ourselves in should make us feel exactly how we want and convey exactly the message that we want others to glean from our presence. This is no easy task! Maybe we'll spend our whole lives doing it! Maybe. But all it means is that we can't...settle.




4 comments:

  1. So happy for this beginning of yours! I, too, am learning that important and big things take time and a lot of patience. Good luck!!

    -Balkis
    http://www.babablogweb.blogspot.com

    P.S.-- Were you an art history major? Just interested because that's the major I'm currently pursuing.

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  2. Oh man, that's super exciting! My cousin lives in Denver and she loves it. And this is so well-written. You are incredibly articulate and that makes your blog such a pleasure to actually read! And I'll be interested to see the evolution of your wardrobe in the months to come.

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  3. Good luck!
    My dad lives out in Denver; he says it fucking rules. I'm sure you'll love it!

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  4. I am giving you a slow-clap for this writing. Its beautiful and inspiring and I wish you luck on your journey. I often feel superficial and unproductive giving so much thought to fashion and clothing, but you make an excellent point, its how we present ourselves to the world and its important that we are honest with ourselves and feel comfortable.

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